Head hurts so bad. Crazy weather. I'm going to bed, hoping I can sleep.

This was a very hard day, one of many, actually. Why does doing "the right thing" have to hurt SO bad? After months of soul searching, heart wrenching agony, I came to the only conclusion that makes sense. I don't like it. I didn't want to do it. In fact, I hate it. Why did I have to step up and do it though? Why didn't I do it earlier? Because I'm the dang, stupid, freakin' "eternal optimist", that's why!!! My mind knows the truth, but, my heart doesn't want to listen to the truth. My heart keeps hoping, and always will. My mind knows not to hope, because all hope is gone. But, my mind and heart are in an eternal struggle, and have been disagreeing for far too long. They must come to an agreement, or a compromise, for now.

They say if you love something, you will let it go...and well, you know the rest of the saying. But, in this case, I don't think that little saying is going to work out quite that way for me. Six months of happiness; eight months of hell; a lifetime of heartbreak and being all alone in the world. Yeah, it hurts to do the right thing. The "right thing" SUCKS. This is going to be hard. God, please hold and help me. I can't do this without You.

God is good. Leaning on you now.

“Real loss only occurs when you lose something that you love more than yourself.” ~unknown

Hugs and prayers for my daughter-in-law.

So very tired. Only eleven more days, and still tons of paperwork and other chores to finish before school is out. Working like crazy to get it all finished in time!! Going to bed extra early tonight. Just want to sleep.

God is good.

Happy Mother's Day to you, Mom. I love and miss you so much. I can't believe it's been almost twenty-six years since you went to Heaven. I think of you and miss you every day.

Thank you, Lord, for Fridays, sunshine, mocha coconut frappacinos (paid for by a good friend in the car ahead of me!), my kids, grandbaby, a kiss and hug from my sweet daddy, and most of all, the gift of Jesus, and Your undying love and arms wrapped around me when I need it the most....all of this, and SO much more...

I'm going to be okay. I'm not there yet, but, I'm getting close,...very close. Finally.

Grace...amazing grace. God is good.

Thank you, Lord.

Walked this evening. Enjoyed the company, the fresh air, and the exercise.

God is good.

Not ready for Monday. A rainy, lazy Sunday, followed by a frantic, busy Monday. Ugh...I'm just ready for summer. Come on, where are you, summer? Can't you please just get here a little bit faster???

"Indifference makes excuses, but love finds a way." ~Joyce Meyer

I'm loving this weather and wishing it could last all year around. I remember as a kid staying outside to play for hours in this kind of weather. I remember catching fireflies in a jar, riding bicycles through puddles, swimming every day in the summer, playing veterinarian with my best friend and next door neighbor, Kreela. I remember lying in the grass, looking up at the sky, not worried about anything. At that time, I had no clue about the time it took to do laundry, wash dishes, clean house, work an eight to ten hour day, etc. Life was easy. Life was simple. Life was good.

I have my mama and my daddy to thank for that. They made my childhood wonderful. Then, when I was twelve, they divorced. What shocks me the most though, is the divorce actually didn't upset me at all. Of course, I would rather have had them stay together, however, I knew they weren't happy. I was even tired of listening to them fuss and argue. It got old. I just wanted peace in my house. Just peace. I'm not going to say it was easy when my dad left, but, it was peaceful. I still like peace. I still want peace. I've never been one to like conflict. It's peace for me. Life is too short to be unhappy.

God is good.