Chemo oncologist today. Glioblastoma multiforme, a grade IV tumor, a malignant astrocytoma. According to the chemo oncologist, "one of the worst kinds of brain tumors you could possibly get." It is the fastest growing, most deadly type of brain tumor. No cure. EVER.

Two months. Two months ago they found this, and two months have been wasted doing NOTHING about this. Waiting on appointments. Waiting on test results. Waiting. WASTING precious time. He could've started treatments TWO MONTHS ago!!!

Today was the fourth day of radiation, first time to see the chemo oncologist. Chemotherapy will start Saturday, when the medicine arrives. Wal-Mart doesn't even carry it, because it is SO expensive. $12,000.00 a month expensive. Yes, I put in the correct amount of zeroes. Twelve thousand dollars a month. Thank the good Lord their insurance/Medi-care will pay for it. I just hope and pray he can tolerate it without getting sick.

I miss my Dad. Sometimes he can bring up the words he wants to say, most of the time, he can't. This breaks my heart. His language is gone sometimes, then, reappears for a moment. But, he ALWAYS manages to call me "baby" and say, "I love you," no matter what.

Oh, dear Lord, please come soon. This is just too hard. Please don't let him suffer. But, I still want to try everything possible to try to give him more time. I still believe in miracles, and I'm praying for one.

Amazing grace...how sweet the sound...