Another Monday done.  A rainy Monday.  A busy Monday.  A very lonely Monday.  Thank goodness for busy days, which don't allow me to dwell on the unknown, the indecision of others, and the limbo state.  Snap out of this!  This is not me.  Get busy;  stay busy. Don't dwell on the sadness.  Focus on the positive.  Focus on the hope.  Focus on the many blessings you have.  It will all work out.  That's what I am told anyway.  I'm believing it.  I do want it to work out.  I'm praying it all works out.

I'm trying to stay positive.  I've ALWAYS been positive.  Why am I having such a hard time doing that now?  October and November.  Maybe that's why, among other traumatic events recently occuring during these two months...  October and November have always been hard for me, at least for the last twenty-five years, it has been the most difficult time of the year for me.  That, Mother's Day, and June 18th, my Mom's birthday.  October 9th, my brother's birthday.  November 3rd, the day I lost my Mom.  November 4th, the day she was buried.  The most horrible and longest day of my life.  I miss them both horribly, year around, but, especially during October and November.  I need you, Mom.  I miss you so, so badly.  I miss you and love you too, little brother.