A new year. 2011. I know this is where I should say something positive like "Happy New Year!". I want to. But, I can't just yet. Oh, I want all of YOU to have a "happy new year". I want anyone reading this to have a year filled with health, happiness (true happiness), prosperity, and peace of mind, knowing that you are living the life that YOU want to live, the life that makes YOU happy. Like I've heard and said SO many times in my life,..."life is too short to not be truly happy". Make the best of every moment, every hour, every day.

2010 was a year of extremes for me:

1)Extremely proud of my kids- Morgan graduated from high school and completed her first semester of college.

2)Extremely happy for my kids- Jake and Amanda welcomed a beautiful baby boy, Jakob, into their lives. He is a wonderful addition to our little neck of the woods!!

3)Extreme helplessness- Morgan's struggles and battle with homesickness while away at college, left me feeling so helpless, when all I really wanted to do was go pack her up and bring her home, and rescue her from the tears and struggles. But, that would not have TRULY helped her, in the long run.

4)Extreme worry and fear - My dad suffered two strokes and multiple mild seizures, which caused some memory loss. Fear of losing my dad is just overwhelming. He is the last person on this planet that loves me unconditionally and without limits, other than my kids, of course. But, he's known me the longest and loved me longer than anyone else. I can't lose him. I just can't. The love between parent and child is like no other.

5)Extreme happiness for me, for several months. Never in my life, except for the birth of my children, was I EVER happier. I never thought it was possible to be that happy. I couldn't believe God had blessed ME with such complete happiness.

6)Then, extreme heartbreak, loss, and an extremely lonely feeling, that just won't quit. It's an everyday struggle, I don't know if I'll ever be able to overcome.

God has a purpose and a plan. I am counting on that. That's the only thing that gets me through each day. I pray constantly, for peace, a return to happiness, and a cure for this lonely broken heart, if that's even possible. God does perform miracles, so, I'm hoping it is possible for me to get over this. We will see.

God is good.