Okay, I'm going to be fine. I'm going to make it. I'm doing great. I keep telling myself all of these things. Pretty soon, surely, I'll start believing them, right? Yes, I'll be fine. I'm getting there, slowly, but, surely. Yes, there are bumps in the road of life. This was, and is a major bump for me, but, I'm doing much, much better than I was the last two or three months. I think my mind, body, and heart are all just worn out and numb from all of the rollercoaster type emotions. We are all screaming, "UNCLE"!!!! This is going to all work out the way it's supposed to...ugh...I've heard that before, and I guess "this" wasn't what I was thinking, hoping, and praying for. God had other plans. So did some other people, I guess. Why can't I just accept them this time? Why is it so hard? Why can't I just move on like everybody else is? Why can't I get through this mourning period? Why do I feel like someone died? Why do I feel like I died? Okay, quit it!!! Arrgghh...I HATE being such a whiner!! Absolutely HATE it!!! That's not me. Never has been. Why now?

Okay, I have got to get busy and get my mind off of that. I must get busy, go do my Christmas shopping, clean house, and then enjoy my Christmas break. I'm ready to relax, spend time with family, friends, go see some Christmas lights, make some Christmas cookies, and watch a few hundred Christmas movies. I WILL get through this. I WILL make it. I WILL be okay. I AM okay, just experiencing another small bump in the road of life...